Usually, when one is to think about a tomato, they imagine a juicy, crimson, delectable fruit. They admire the heavenly slices of seed between the buns of a burger, the chopped pieces littered in crispy green salads, or the puréed sauce between layers of gooey cheese.
To Ayanna Kane, tomatoes look like ancient Egyptian artifacts.
Her life has been confusing concerning beyond belief after finding out three years ago that she was a descendant of the pharaohs and an Egyptian magician. Often described as a ray of sunshine, she’s been through a lot after her uncle blew up the Rosetta Stone: finding her long-lost cousins, making sure her dad didn’t die after being possessed by the god of evil, making sure her dad didn’t die after accidentally starting a civil war, and stopping a giant red snake from eating her cousin’s girlfriend.
Great times.
Now, she’s been sent on a mission to retrieve a moldy tomato from the Brooklyn Museum, where she once broke into with a healer, a dying guy, her cousins, and a baboon. It’s best if you don’t ask.
Apparently, the Tomato of Tawaret was preserved after the hippo goddess used it to scare away evil Russians at a mock dwarf wedding. As weird as it may seem, Aya couldn’t just deny a direct order from the most powerful magician in the world.
AKA the Chief Lector.
AKA her literal father.
Aya arrived at the elevated altar…and groaned.
“There’s no way that’s an actual tomato,” She mumbled.
She ambled towards the very much rotten piece of fruit, not caring about jumping spiders or exploding goat traps. Big mistake. The second her hand hit the tomato, a goat appeared next to her, bleating. Of course, after all the weird things she’s seen in her life, this didn’t surprise her at all.
Until the goat exploded.
Aya fell to the ground, shielding her eyes as she heard one last “BAAAA!” from the poor goat who she had concluded was a shabti, or clay. After the ringing in her ears died out, she cautiously peeked around only to be berated by the screeching of alarms. Cursing, she quickly got to her feet and headed for the door. After giving it a final push, she stepped out into the open, looking back at the museum.
“Just a normal day in the life of a Kane,”
end